I turned 41
years old two days ago. Honestly I don’t think my parents thought I would make
it this far. After catching me driving a motor cycle up and down a run way
racing airplanes, my father said to me, “it would be a miracle if I made it
through my teens.” I don’t know if he was implying that he was going to kill me
or my stupid decisions would. But here I am at 41 feeling like I have already
lived a life time full of experiences and I look forward to many more.
I remember when I was growing up hearing guys
in their late 30’s and early 40’s saying things like, “when you get to my age…”
or “I have lived long enough to….” I never wanted to be one of those guys. It
was like admitting you are old but I can say at this point in my life I have
lived long enough to see things come into style, go out and come back again. I
have seen history repeat itself. As a believer I’ve seen biblical doctrines
come and go and lived long enough to see good and bad fruit come for those that
adhered to the teachings or chose to take a different path.
In my own life there are times that I have
re-examined some of my own doctrinal beliefs and realized I had been steered
the wrong way or that I was thankful for the direction that placed me on solid
ground.
The older I get the less tolerance I have for
taking wrong paths. Mostly because of the realization that my time here on
earth gets shorter with every day. You know the things we never thought about at
17 racing motorcycles because I thought I was bullet proof, but also because at
this stage in my life I want to minimize as much hurt as possible for myself and
for those around me.
This past year has been one of my most
challenging years as a Christian. In fact just 5 weeks ago I was sitting in the
office of a Christian counselor whom I have great respect for and I told him I
didn’t know if I even believe anymore. My mind was full of doubts and
questions. Having grown up in a Christian home as a pastors kid I never really
asked some of the questions that were cropping up in my mind and causing
doubts. Was God even real? Was Christianity just some emotional crutch we use
to deal with death or heart ache? How awful must death be for those that have
no hope of seeing their child again or the very thought of an eternity of
nothing once you die were some of the things I struggled with.
The counselor, as he often does, just let me
talk and then encouraged me to ask the questions that were causing doubt. I was
encouraged by the green light to ask and seek answers but internally I was
still struggling. How can a committed unwavering Christian suddenly be
struggling with basic doctrinal beliefs? I mean I should be past this. Over the
last 5 weeks I started searching, honestly not knowing what I would find or how
things would turn out. This is what I found in my journey and I trust it will
help someone else that finds themselves in the same place.
My lack of faith and belief are the product of
bad doctrine. Now I know some that read this will think I am directing this at
either the leaders of my past or the pastor of the church I now attend. That is
not the case. I have believed for many years that pastors are just men that
have struggles and at times bad doctrine like the rest of us. 1 Corinthians
13:12 tells us, “We see through a glass
darkly.” No one is perfect and bad doctrine can come from the most
committed Bible believing pastor. It’s part of being human.
In my earlier years of being a Christian I got
a lot of really good foundational teaching but I also leaned towards doctrines
that tended to be legalistic and harsh. The truth is my personality leaned that
way. I am a person that must have justice. It permeates through every inch of
my being. I hate injustice. In the world, in politics, in sports or in daily driving
(Yeah I am a road rage guy), if you want to see me blow a gasket let me view
something as unjust and you will have a fight on your hand. I mean after all God is just, so
there was no convincing me I was wrong, there was no room for mercy. Don’t get
me wrong there is a place for justice but the problem with people that always
seek justice is they more often than not will error on the side of judgement or
punishment. I always felt I had a green light to attack and judge others as if
I had a complete understanding of God’s justice…how arrogant. My propensity for
fighting and harshness was a great fit for a modern day Pharisee.
When I started to realize this about myself
and believers like me I began to recoil and as if on a pendulum swung to the
other side. I heard teachings about God’s love and mercy in a different way and
I wanted to be on the side of mercy and love because after all no one likes a
hard guy. The problem was as the pendulum swung I found myself becoming
confused and frustrated as I tried to view every situation through love and
mercy with no justice. The farther I went with those that espoused to love and
mercy at all costs the more frustrated and discouraged I became. There were
always major inconsistencies in their messages and when I spoke up my opinions
were shot down or disparaged because I was “legalistic” or “unloving.”
As time went on I became less and less
involved. I literally told my friend,
the counselor, “I don’t think there is a place for me in Christianity. I can’t
reconcile the God who is Just and the merciful all loving Jesus that is being
pushed from pulpits and conversations all over the country.” After a lifetime
of Christianity I felt like I didn’t have the first clue about who Jesus was.
This is probably right where I needed to be. This is when my eyes were opened
to the false doctrine that is being peddled and believed all over this country
and had me wanting to give up.
The Bible is full of warnings against false
teachers and doctrines. “But there were
also false prophets among the people, just as there will be false teachers
among you. They will secretly introduce destructive heresies, even denying the
sovereign Lord who bought them—bringing swift destruction on themselves.” (2
Peter 2:1) So what is this destructive heresy that I am speaking off?
Sometime in the 1990’s a phrase started being
used and took off in Christian settings, “What would Jesus Do?” WWJD was on
t-shirts, bracelets and even tattoos. The questions itself had merit. What a
great way to live, doing things the way Jesus would do them. I often asked
myself that very question when situations arose. However, it didn’t take me
long to realize where this could cause issues. Remember I was a hard, justice
seeking Pharisee so as you can surmise all my interpretations of WWJD came
through that lens. I had created a Jesus in my likeness and with a penchant for
doing things that aligned with my desires and inclinations.
With any new
paradigm change there is a lack of comfort. At first I figured I was just
learning to conform to the new Jesus that I was being told about ad so desperately
wanted to see. Then suddenly I realized
many of those I was looking to for guidance and inspiration had done the very
same thing I had earlier in my walk, created a Jesus in their image. The deeper
I got into this new doctrine I started to hear things like, “I love Jesus but I
don’t know about anything else.” “I love the idea of Jesus just not sure about
religion.” “I think Jesus is great but I don’t believe the Bible.”
At this point I realized why I couldn’t find
this Jesus that many were talking about. He doesn’t exist, except in the mind
of those that created him. Recently while discussing some very basic Biblical
doctrine with a person they literally said to me, “We don’t serve the same
Jesus.” I realize now they are correct. They don’t serve Jesus at all. They
serve an image of Jesus they have created in their mind. There are leaders that
use their Jesus to manipulate and control you. I mean who wants to do something
that a leader is stating Jesus wouldn’t do and what better way to gain the
approval of man but to “know” what Jesus would do in every circumstance.
Over the last 6 months I have seen and read
spiritual leaders use Jesus to tell you who to vote for or not vote for. I have
read and been told by individuals, “Jesus wouldn’t build a wall.”(Referencing
the possible wall on the Mexican Border) “Jesus would take in all the Syrian
refugees.” “Jesus would march with BLM.” “Jesus wouldn’t vote for Trump.”
“Jesus would support gay marriage because it is true love.” I literally had a
person tell me, “Jesus would understand why some women have abortions.” Now I
don’t know where you stand on any of these issues but I would be very careful
vouching for Jesus’ support without His approval.
The issue is not necessarily whether he would
support these issues but that fact men are interpreting what He would and
wouldn’t approve of. Unfortunately His support tends to fall in line with our
desires and not the other way around. So let me ask you. Who is really God in
your life? If you are calling the shots and pigeon holing Jesus into your mold
the answer is clear. You are the God of your own life, hence the reason I or
any other person will be unable to see Jesus in you. Unless of course they
agree with your ideological leanings then you can start a whole movement in
Jesus name when in reality he is nowhere to be found.
We have created a Jesus in our image and with
our agendas. We have exalted humanism and works once again. Several weeks ago I
started to realize that what I had been pursuing doctrinally was really the
same as what I had come out of, just in a sweeter, kinder and dare I say more
cunning package. Because Jesus is now in our likeness our worship, programs and
ministries are striving to be more culturally relevant. We have to manipulate a
Holy God to fit our generation and its needs as opposed to allowing him to mold
and makes us into his likeness and purposes. It is almost comical because this
doctrine professes love as its core but those that don’t agree with this
movement are ostracized and chastised as legalistic, and in a cruel irony those
people become virtually unlovable. The great hypocrisy of this movement is they
create a Jesus in their likeness then choose who is worthy of their or should I
say His love and acceptance.
Because Jesus has become our lap dog, personal
time in His word and in prayer become secondary or non-existent. Hence those in
positions of leadership are often immature and looked at more as something to
be emulated socially as opposed to followed spiritually. They are cool, hip,
but spiritual paper weights.
The end of this doctrine is ultimately condoning
sin under the guise of love. It will be a doctrine that eventually removes the
concept of eternal damnation and judgement because once again no one likes a
hard guy. Judgement and conviction will becoming terms of the past, you know
for the legalistic people. Finally the circle will be complete when, just like
the legalistic Pharisee eternal salvation will come through works and the blood
of Jesus will be of little need and effect.
It is interesting that a doctrine that started
with love will finally falter because of a lack of love.
As I meditated on this over the last few days
I was struck by a glaring omission whenever I hear sermons on I Corinthians 13,
otherwise known as the love chapter. “If
I speak in the tongues[a] of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only
a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and
can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move
mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the
poor and give over my body to be burned but do not have love, I gain nothing.” (1
Corinthians 13:1-3) As I read this scripture I am blown away by the fact Paul
said, if I give my body to be burned without love I gain nothing. How is that
possible?!
One would think giving their body to be burned
for a cause or giving all they had to the poor would certainly insinuate love.
Who would do that if there isn’t love involved? Yet we do see this kind of love
all over the world. It doesn’t take Christ to show love. There are many
organizations around the world doing good for others, sacrificing and even
dying out of human love and compassion. So what was Paul referring too?
We often think the love chapter deals with our
relationship with one another and we can certainly glean much from it, but it
also deals with our love for God. If you think I am reaching remember the
discourse Jesus had in Matthew 22:36-40 “Teacher,
which is the greatest commandment in the Law?” Jesus replied: “‘Love the
Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your
mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is
like it: Love your neighbor as yourself. All the Law and the Prophets hang
on these two commandments.” Our first and greatest love must be God, not
our causes, churches, agendas and endeavors, even in those endeavors are given
to us by Him. When we create a Jesus in our likeness we are really proving we
love ourselves. Churches are full of people who declare their love for Jesus
but fail to submit to his Lordship. How sad it will be on that day when those
who have done so much and sacrificed so much for others have this exchange with
God. “Lord, Lord we did so many works in
your name…and He will say depart from me your lawless one I never knew you.” (Matthew
7:22-23)
I think the Spirit of God is calling out like
he did to the church of Ephesus in Revelations 2, “To the angel of the church in Ephesus write…. I know your deeds,
your hard work and your perseverance…You have persevered and have endured
hardships for my name, and have not grown weary. Yet I hold this against you:
You have forsaken your first love. Consider how far you have fallen! Repent and
do the things you did at first.”
If you find yourself in the same boat as I was
here are a few tips that will help you get back on track and see through the
confusion.
Get into the Word and study. The lack of
Biblical context and understanding may be at its greatest point since common
men were given the opportunity to read and believe for themselves. Pray for
understanding to see who Jesus really is. “Seek and ye shall find. Knock and it
shall be opened unto you.”(Matthew 7:7) Learn who Christ was in his entirety. It
is astonishing to me to see how little air time God the father seems to get
anymore. The reason is because it is easier to create a kinder, gentler Jesus
then it is a Holy Father yet they are one in the same.
Stop letting others perception of Jesus automatically
become your reality. He will reveal himself to you if you let him. If someone
is peddling a Jesus that does not line up with scripture or has constant bend
to their advantage or ideology, it isn’t Jesus.
Finally if you are struggling with questions
about the balance between love and mercy you are not alone. Spend 5 minutes on
Facebook discussing any world or political topic and you will find that almost
everyone whether they admit it or not (They generally won’t) is struggling with
that balance. Sadly our pride is a blinder that clouds our vision and causes dissension.
The key to breaking through the confusion and hostility is found in Micah 6:8. “He hath shewed thee, O man, what is good;
and what doth the LORD require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy,
and to walk humbly with thy God.” Justice
and mercy can walk in perfect unity as long as there is humility. Justice
without mercy will cause legalism and bondage. Mercy without justice will
create carnality and lawlessness. Justice and mercy bridled by humility will
bring peace and freedom.
How good and how pleasant it is for brethren to
dwell together in unity. (Psalms 133:1)
Thanks for
reading.
Steve
